Old(er) Dogs

The dogs are behaving badly.  I’m not sure why, except that maybe as the weather has been getting colder and they have been in the house more, they are probably stir-crazy.  It’s a bad time for our dogs.  They are getting older and crankier.  It’s hard to reason with them. 

Toby has decided that he can do just about anything he wants (which he can – he’s my boy).  He jumps up on the couch with every opportunity.  He hasn’t yet learned that it’s only couch time with me once in a while and only after Daddy’s gone to bed, so we don’t get in trouble.  He’s the only one I let up, because he’s the only one that I trust not to have an accident.

Sky has gotten crotchety.  She hurts.  Her legs hurt, and her back hurts and we think she gets headaches.  We probably should have put her down over the summer but neither of us can bear it and we hope she goes in her sleep.  She growls at the other two dogs and plays too rough with the cat, and she emits a sense of panic if she gets too excited.  She’s almost like a kid that’s had too much sugar and we have to calm her down.  But she’s a good old girl, and she loves us (mainly him) so much.

Bella, our baby now 10, is still very active.  She’s getting more vocal as Sky’s health declines.  The German shepherd in her is making its appearance and it’s loud and annoying.  I tell her to change her barks up a bit, but no; she chooses the same monotone bark over and over and over…  But she’s still a baby.  She’s the one that needs to be cuddled during thunderstorms or after the fire alarm erupts from the ceiling.

Yes, they are all turning into the epitome of the “classic senior citizen”, and that’s okay.  Where else would we feel unconditional love?  With people there are always conditions, but with dogs it seems there are none.  Sure you have to feed them, but even if you didn’t they would probably find something on their own.  It might not smell great and they would probably roll in it first, but they would persevere. 

I’ve come home to books ripped up on the floor and yelled and swatted their furry butts and sent them outside until I cooled off and the minute I let them in they still loved me.  There was no cold shoulder.  No hateful sideways glances, just pure joy that I was there.  Oh, if we could all be like that, what a world it would be!

So I guess I will cuddle my senior dogs and love them up and get covered with hair and slobbery dog kisses.  No matter how badly they’re behaving, I know I’ve done worse, and they always pardon me.  It makes their “bad” attitude totally forgivable.  

The Start of Goodbye

            It’s happening.  We’ve been waiting for it and knew the time was coming.  Our old girl, Sky, is feeling her age.  This morning we woke up to pitiful cries coming from the living room.  D usually gets up with the dogs, and it’s been getting earlier and earlier.  I told him this morning (at 4:30am) to put in his ear plugs and wait until five.  They need to learn one just does not get up at the crack of dawn when one goes to bed AFTER dark.  So he gets up at five (4:55) and goes downstairs to find our girl in a mess of pain.

Sometimes I feel like such an ogre. 

So he gives her an aspirin, lets them out, feeds them and then later comes upstairs to tell me that she is really sore.  We know that this has been coming.  She’s been very stiff in her hind legs for a while now and when she walks up steps her hind end actually hops.  Luckily she doesn’t have to use steps all the time.

She’s been incontinent off and on, and we know it’s not behavioral.  Last night she lost control and pooped a little in the house.  I told him when I went upstairs to bed.  We know this isn’t good and this is finally what prompted me to have my old dog, Jack, put down.  Not because I didn’t want to clean up messes – I would have forever, if he was happy, if his quality of life was good.  But he wasn’t happy and he was hanging around for me.  It was the hardest decision I ever made. 

Now the decision belongs to D.  Sky is his dog.  All I can do is let him know of my experiences.  I’ve had dogs and cats all my life.  Sky is his first dog and from the way she looks at him I believe she absolutely adores him. 

When I came downstairs to get ready to leave for work she got up and walked out to the kitchen to see me.  Her legs were so much stiffer than I’ve ever seen them and I was afraid she was going to fall over.  D wondered if maybe there were pills the vet could give her to make her comfortable, but I think a cortisone shot will make a difference.  He wonders if it’s his fault she has lost her muscle tone and is so frail.  I told him that some old dogs get fat, some lose weight, but they all get old and this is normal.  I told him it wasn’t his fault.  She cannot stay a puppy forever, no matter how little gray she sports. 

We’ve been lucky to have her as long as we have.  We know she is between 12 and 14 years old.  She was hit by a car when she was a puppy and within the last several years her back legs hurt when she exercises too much.  She loves to swim but she won’t stop once she’s in the water.  She’ll cry as she paddles but she won’t get out.  And she’ll bite at the bubbles until her tummy fills with water.  It breaks our hearts to keep her out of the water, but she’s so obsessive compulsive we can’t let her in for fear we won’t get her out.

If only they all went peacefully in their sleep.  I held a cat once while he was dying.  His lungs were filling up with fluid and there was nothing I could do but hold him and talk to him and pray it went quickly for him.  His family had abandoned him and he adopted me.  I never want to lose another animal like that.  I never want her to feel helpless and in pain and not in control of herself. 

 

This will be a hard summer of saying goodbye.  I hope we do her justice and make her as comfortable as she can be and I hope when the time comes he will know it was the only decision he could make for her.  And that it was the right decision.