Play It Cool

Today's prompt?  It's "Play", so I decided to "Play it Cool".  Hope you like it.  You can find the challenge here at Writer's Digest.  

Play It Cool

I try to play it cool, really I do.

My motto is "live and let live".

Not so much the people around me

and sometimes I get so frustrated

I just want to make them realize that

pushing

their agenda

down my throat

is not the way to do things

so I fire back in

full

righteous

mode

and blast them.

And then I step back,

rub my face,

lean into the corner and shrug.

Whatever.

That’s how I play.

If I'd Only Followed Directions (DRAFT)

Yesterday was Day 3 of the Writer's Digest November Challenge.  The prompt was "If I'd Only ________".  Here is my interpretation:

If I’d Only Followed Directions

The directions my parents gave me always seemed so stuffy,

so grown up and

unbelievable to me.

Get an education,

get a job,

meet someone,

fall in love,

get married,

buy a house,

have some kids,

grow old together.

Add in the standard don’t smoke,

drink in moderation,

don’t do drugs.

Mix it up with treat others as you would have done unto you,

turn the other cheek,

always be kind.

All of this would guarantee me a

picture

perfect

life.

Except somewhere along the way I messed up

and following directions got screwed around and not for me. 

I was unique and I marched to a different drummer.

I did everything backwards and upside down.

I still look for that picket fence and those children

with the dad that takes care of everyone.

I wonder if he would have made a difference in our lives,

made my life easier,

made it so that I wouldn’t have had to make so many decisions.

Oh, if only I’d listened!

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For Your Own Good

Anxiety rips my chest apart and causes pain in my

heart and

non-stop thoughts in my head about

how I can make everything better,

that kissing your boo-boos will make all the bad stuff go away and

then I realize I can’t fix everything like I used to and

you are an adult with a husband and

children and

you both need to stop acting like kids yourselves and

face up to the fact that he is mentally unstable and

my grandchildren are living in that environment and

getting more and more unstable themselves when they are faced with moving yet again and

this time without more of their stuff even though their father gets to take all of his toys and

the system that is set up to protect them does nothing,

NOTHING, and

they are left on the wayside again even though

we’ve told their teachers there is something wrong and please,

please,

please report something, anything,

so they might have a halfway decent life, even if it is in a stranger’s home, and

even if we never see them again as long as they’re safe and away from him, and

then maybe you will decide you’ve had enough and

leave him too and

start your life the way you would have had you not decided to leave home at sixteen and…

…then I take a breath.  I think that this will never change.  This story will play out over and over again, and

I need to check out.  I look at the clock. 

Twilight will not make the dark circles under my eyes any brighter. 

I love you, but this is your circus. 

You chose that monkey. 

I will help destroy him, but in doing so, you and I may be destroyed too. 

As a mother

I have to tell you

– it’s for your own good.